You chose someone responsible. Honest. Probably the one who always RSVP’d. Or didn’t panic when you locked your keys in the car.
Good choice.
But here’s what you didn’t picture.
Them, hunched over a laptop. Searching.
“Duties of an executor”
“Do I need a death certificate for a car title transfer?”
“Can an executor be sued?”
“Funeral expenses reimbursement?”
They’re not panicking, exactly. But they’re close.
Being an executor is a job.
They have to:
- Locate your will
- File it (probably with a fee they weren’t expecting)
- Track down accounts you didn’t even remember you had
- Calm down your cousin who just found out she’s not in the will
- Deal with banks
- Deal with your house
- Deal with your people
None of it is ceremonial. It is paperwork, logistics, and timing. It’s phone holds and That One Relative who always makes things harder. It’s getting everything right the first time, with no rehearsal.
This is why they’ll be Googling. A lot.
Because you didn’t leave instructions. Or maybe you left too many. Or maybe it’s all clear to you, but not to anyone else. The to-do list isn’t pinned to the fridge. The lawyer’s name isn’t saved in their phone. The passwords? Nobody knows where you kept them.
They’re trying their best. They love you. But they are overwhelmed, and they are probably guessing.
Make it easier.
Leave them this:
- A will that’s current and signed
- Contact info for your attorney, if you have one
- A one-pager: where things are, who to call, what matters most
- The basics: accounts, policies, titles, names spelled correctly
- And yes, name a backup. Always.
Also—tell them they’re named. Don’t let them find out from a letter after the funeral. That’s awful.
They’re going to try to get it right. You can help them.
Don’t let Google be their only guide. Let your plan talk for you. Clearly. Simply. Without any guessing.
That’s how you protect them. And that’s how you protect what matters.
